Bisexuals: Not Unicorns.
Thursday, 12 September 2013 05:35 amTruth: if you are American and female, and the conversation somehow ends up outting you as a bisexual, someone will bring up high school/college girls and experimentation, even if you are pushing 40 and haven't been near a school in over a decade.
It's a nasty little line...
"All the girls at my school said they were bi, because it was cool." But the speaker knows better, for he knows conclusively and unequivocally every one of those girls' heart of hearts and who was tapping each and every pussy. Verily, it cannot be that girls simply were bisexual (though probably fewer in number than he remembers), for there is no such creature.
"I've read about how often college girls are 'gay till graduation' and use bisexuality to feel out a sense of identity." Well, I'm glad the New York Times has once and for all declared that the bisexual college girls are simply taking their gonads for a test drive, and that these experiences didn't count, thereby reassuring parents and young men everywhere that the girls will come to their senses and back to dick once they've got a BA.
"I know this chick who said she was just experimenting in college." Well, she is our queen, and her word is law, so I guess that's that.
Yes, college students experiment with a lot of things on their way to figuring out who they are, regardless of gender. Yes, our society has been more open to girls experimenting with sexuality than boys, and yes, there are studies galore suggesting that females in our society are more open to a fluid sense of sexuality than males in our society. Yes, this is an interesting discussion to have in the context of human sexuality in general--but not as something to bring up whenever you find out someone is bisexual.
If every time you hear 'bisexual', you immediately jump to a casual remark about high school or college girls just experimenting, or just saying it to be cool, you are essentially negating bisexuality entirely as just a bit of immature experimentation. You're also declaring yourself the arbiter of other people's sexuality. (Sorry college girls, you can't really be gay/bi unless we say so!) Oh, and setting yourself up as the judge of how valid other people's sexual experiences are. (No no no, Friday was 'experimenting', it doesn't count. But we'll let you keep Saturday!)
We exist, motherfucker. We are not suspicious cryptids lurking at the edges of your college experience, the chupacabras of the dating scene. You don't get to say who is and isn't really bi, what does or doesn't count. Nobody has to pass a test, list their lays or meet a certain quota within six months of graduation to count as actually bisexual. You are not the vagina dictator. You don't get to make that call.
Even, I swear to you, even if someone mentions experimenting in their college days. Even if a classmate you know well graduates, get a boyfriend, decides her vaginator days are behind her and dismisses it all as youthful experimentation. That's just her take on her experience, which only she has the right to make, and only regarding her experiences. One chick declaring herself over pussy does not disprove the existence of all bisexual chicks.
Every time I'm talking with someone and we trip over the big reveal*, they bring up high school/college girls, with that dismissive 'only experimenting' or 'only to be cool' decree. Every goddamn time. It's never relevant. It's so irrelevant, it's like responding to someone introducing themselves as a stay-at-home parent with, "That's interesting. I hear most murdered children are killed by a parent. I read an article in the New York Times about it."
Interesting, in an objective discussion about that topic, but totally fucking irrelevant here.
* Guys, if you mention that a chick is hot and reveal yourself to be hetero/bi, you don't get to complain about anyone 'forcing their sexuality down your throat' by agreeing with that assessment.
It's a nasty little line...
"All the girls at my school said they were bi, because it was cool." But the speaker knows better, for he knows conclusively and unequivocally every one of those girls' heart of hearts and who was tapping each and every pussy. Verily, it cannot be that girls simply were bisexual (though probably fewer in number than he remembers), for there is no such creature.
"I've read about how often college girls are 'gay till graduation' and use bisexuality to feel out a sense of identity." Well, I'm glad the New York Times has once and for all declared that the bisexual college girls are simply taking their gonads for a test drive, and that these experiences didn't count, thereby reassuring parents and young men everywhere that the girls will come to their senses and back to dick once they've got a BA.
"I know this chick who said she was just experimenting in college." Well, she is our queen, and her word is law, so I guess that's that.
Yes, college students experiment with a lot of things on their way to figuring out who they are, regardless of gender. Yes, our society has been more open to girls experimenting with sexuality than boys, and yes, there are studies galore suggesting that females in our society are more open to a fluid sense of sexuality than males in our society. Yes, this is an interesting discussion to have in the context of human sexuality in general--but not as something to bring up whenever you find out someone is bisexual.
If every time you hear 'bisexual', you immediately jump to a casual remark about high school or college girls just experimenting, or just saying it to be cool, you are essentially negating bisexuality entirely as just a bit of immature experimentation. You're also declaring yourself the arbiter of other people's sexuality. (Sorry college girls, you can't really be gay/bi unless we say so!) Oh, and setting yourself up as the judge of how valid other people's sexual experiences are. (No no no, Friday was 'experimenting', it doesn't count. But we'll let you keep Saturday!)
We exist, motherfucker. We are not suspicious cryptids lurking at the edges of your college experience, the chupacabras of the dating scene. You don't get to say who is and isn't really bi, what does or doesn't count. Nobody has to pass a test, list their lays or meet a certain quota within six months of graduation to count as actually bisexual. You are not the vagina dictator. You don't get to make that call.
Even, I swear to you, even if someone mentions experimenting in their college days. Even if a classmate you know well graduates, get a boyfriend, decides her vaginator days are behind her and dismisses it all as youthful experimentation. That's just her take on her experience, which only she has the right to make, and only regarding her experiences. One chick declaring herself over pussy does not disprove the existence of all bisexual chicks.
Every time I'm talking with someone and we trip over the big reveal*, they bring up high school/college girls, with that dismissive 'only experimenting' or 'only to be cool' decree. Every goddamn time. It's never relevant. It's so irrelevant, it's like responding to someone introducing themselves as a stay-at-home parent with, "That's interesting. I hear most murdered children are killed by a parent. I read an article in the New York Times about it."
Interesting, in an objective discussion about that topic, but totally fucking irrelevant here.
* Guys, if you mention that a chick is hot and reveal yourself to be hetero/bi, you don't get to complain about anyone 'forcing their sexuality down your throat' by agreeing with that assessment.